*As a side note, I still haven’t been assigned to work at the library. Perhaps it was because I was surprised by the transfer to an unexpected department, and failed to write my transfer request in my career plan.AsIfoundmyselfoverwhelminglyshortontimeIoccasionallyaskedmyhusbandtopickthechildrenfromthenurseryschool,yetIfounditreallyhardtobalancethings.Duringthisperiod,acertainmaleemployeewhohadjusttransferredintothedepartmentasteamleadersaid,“MywifeandItaketurnspickingupourchildfromthenurseryschool,sopleasereducemyovertimeonthosedays.”Ithoughttherequestwasnatural,butitalsomademeponderalittle.Ihadseenotherfemalesenioremployeesrushingoutofthedoortopickuptheirchildren,andsoIhadassumeditwas“awoman’sjob.”IalsothoughtthatsinceIwas“allowed”toworkshorterhours,Ishouldbegratefulfortheopportunityandnotlookagifthorseinthemouth.Allsuchthoughtsarosewithinmymind,despitethefactthatmyhusbandhadalwaysbeenwillingtomakeadjustmentsforthepickups.Partlybecauseoftheneedtocoordinatewiththisotherteamleader,myhusbandandIintroducedanalternatepickupsystem.Thereweremanytwistsandturns,butthefinalformcomprisedtwodaysofreducedworkhours,onedayofregularworkhours,andtwodaysofovertimework.Thegreatestbenefitherewasmentalstability.Leaderswithchildrenfeelindebtedbothtotheirworkplaceandtheirfamilies,fornotbeingabletofulfillentirelybothendsofthebargain.However,whenIleaveontimeorleaveearly,Icansaytomychildren,“IcamehomeearlytodayandsoIcanplaymorethanusual,”andondayswhenIworkovertime,Icansaytoteammembers,“ifyoucan’tfinishit,Icantakealookatitlater.”Ineithercaseyouaffirmthefactthatyouareacceptingacertainamountofresponsibility(thatis,puttingagoodfaceonthings).Beingabletoworkovertimedoesn’tmakeagoodleader,andIamnotpositiveconcerningovertimework.Yet,Iwasfinallyabletogainconfidenceasaleader,bycreatingasystemthatpermittedmetoserveasabastionformyteam,wheneverneeded.OnesummerdaywhenIwasonashortenedworkschedule,beforepreparingdinnerIwenttoaparkwithmyyoungchildrenintheearlyeveningwhileitwasstillbright,andweplayedwithaball.Thiswasnotsomethingthathappenedoften,andsoIstillrecalltheindescribablesenseofjoyandliberationIfeltonthatday.ThetimeIspentwithmyfamilywhenIwasfreefromwork,andthetimeIspentatworkfreefrommyfamily,werebothintheirownwaygiftsforme.Thiswasdespitethefactthattheexperienceoccurredoverabriefperiodoftime,whenmychildrenweresmall.Althoughit’sasimpleandcommonplacethingtodo,wheneverIenvisageapointwherethingsarelikelytogettoughatwork,Iplanaweekdayoffinadvance,andworkwhilelookingforwardtothatday.OnthosedaysIlovetoloungeaboutathomewithoutdoinganythingcreative,suchasreadingabookornoddingoff.Employeesinthedepartmentoftensay,“Sorry,butI’mgoingtotakeadayoff.”However,the“sorry”partisunnecessary,andIhopetheyalsooccasionallytaketimeoffforfunthings,andnotjustonoccasionswhentheyhappentofeelunwell.Ibelievethepositiveimpactmembershaveonanorganizationwhentheyarehealthyandcheerful,isgreaterthanwhatweimagine.Whenmycareercommenced,therewasnochildcareleavesystem,nomajorearthquakes,noCOVID-19pandemic,noeraof100-yearlifespans,andnosingularity.Inanyera,Ithinkitcriticalforustosecureafootholdonastyleoflifeandwork,thatisnotboundbyprecedentsandassumptions.Timesarechangingatspeedsexceedingcommonsense,andmorethanwecanimagine.However,itismysincerehopethatallwhohavestudiedatSophiaUniversitywillbeabletomakechoices,thatarebothhappyandflexible.With the members of the Center for Language Education and Research who have been involved since the launch 8ReducingStressandTryingaChangeofPaceAMessagefortheNextGeneration
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